The first two times I remember being flashed were in my childhood. When I was about eight, a man stopped his car in an alley as I was attempting to cross it. Having been raised with a "healthy" fear of strangers, I approached reluctantly when he motioned me over. Inside the open window of his car, the man was holding his erect penis in one hand, and the steering wheel in the other. I ran away. The second time, when I was maybe thirteen, a friend of mine and I were riding the bus somewhere. A man in an adjacent seat was sitting, legs open, with his penis and balls hanging languidly from his entirely too short shorts. The man was grinning. I don't remember our being frightened by this, merely grossed out. But, instead of shouting at the man, or telling the bus driver what was going on, we simply giggled nervously and changed seats.
Why didn't my friend and I report the incident to the bus driver? Perhaps it was the man's confidence in his gaze that prevented us from seeing this as a terrible act. Perhaps it is the fact that young women are trained to avoid conflict and simply move away from an aggressor, rather than confront that aggressor head on and say, "No. Not okay."
Gould, through impeccable research, not only explains the whys and wherefores of why men (and some women) flash, she also delves deeply into the reasons that women react so passively to what, although seemingly mild, is an incredibly aggressive act.
Before reading "Exposing Phallacy," it never occurred to me to think to deeply about the culture of flashers. Moreover, I didn't even know there was such a culture. While deeply disturbing, this sexual proclivity is also quite fascinating to read about. And Gould's writing and research allowed me an insight into an act that I had put very little thought into, even though I (and many others) have been victims of it.
Gould not only explores the motivations, practices, turn-ons and culture around flashing, but goes on to describe and analyze the reasons why women react the way they generally do when flashed. This book is a thorough and fascinating piece of writing around a subject that has been largely ignored by society, psychology and sex research.
I hope that, if I am ever flashed again, I have the presence of mind not to scurry away, but to look the man directly in the penis and proclaim, "Why...that almost looks like a penis, but it's much too small."
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